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Comments for 'SPARTAN III Ch 1: This is War'



MC's Cousin
11:42 pm | February 21, 2004
One more thing. Now, if written correctly, short stories can be good. If it is full of suspense than people can't wait for the next little tid-bit. But after a while it can piss people off, so only do it every couple or more preferably, every few stories. Like a bridge again, if a bridge is too short, it becomes almost pointless (unless your storyline is K.A.).

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MCC
MC's Cousin
11:42 pm | February 21, 2004
One more thing. Now, if written correctly, short stories can be good. If it is full of suspense than people can't wait for the next little tid-bit. But after a while it can piss people off, so only do it every couple or more preferably, every few stories. Like a bridge again, if a bridge is too short, it becomes almost pointless (unless your storyline is K.A.).

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MCC
Anonymous
9:09 pm | February 19, 2004
i like eggs and i want to kiss a bird with tp in my spunk
blind_snowman
8:28 pm | February 19, 2004
Yeh... and a poem is like a supension bridge, and the verses are the metal chords. You don't have enough and the bridge doesn't stay up, you put too many and you piss off your contractors... or something.

Promising series!
MC's Cousin
3:20 pm | February 19, 2004
Not bad, but try to add a little bit to that story. Break it up into more paragraphs with a little bit more story in it. And add more storyline in there somewhere. Think of a fanfic story as a bridge: your storyline is the metal beams, the bigger and the more overall beams there are, the more your bridge can hold up to readers and their comments; your "side details" or big and small defining details is the rebar, it holds the concrete (your story) together in the small parts and under the twisting and warping it will undergo. Just think about that.

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