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Comments for 'Shadows of Archon II (part 8) - Imperius the Destroyer'



Wado
12:48 am | September 5, 2002
Thanks diablo
el_halo_diablo
12:05 am | September 5, 2002
great as usual Wado! I love this series! twists and turns everywhere!
Wado
10:10 pm | September 4, 2002
Thanks Nike for everything. *I don't remember saying you didn't understand Halo* but sorry if I said something like that.

Hey next time you give me a story prediction, let me know why you think so. I like to get the reader to fill in the blanks but I am curious why you think the flood will turn on the group. Have they done anything to indicate they will? Is it just that they can't be trusted, the nature of the flood?
Nike
9:45 pm | September 4, 2002
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention: I'm 11 and in 6th grade. I can take any words but f---. And I understand Halo very well, thank you very much. For one, I don't know how to posts stories. And two, my parents won't let me. I have a lot of great stories that everybody would like but I can't post. Make I could seank-post, lol.
Wado
8:45 pm | September 4, 2002
...lol
Knightmare
8:24 pm | September 4, 2002
ah hell wado who gives a damn? Ima swear in my next story a lot... Just to be an annoying lille 'rev' not finishing.
Wado
10:03 am | September 4, 2002
*I used one really bad word in more than 20 story posts.

Meaning that I only used one bad word in one post out of more than 20 story posts. One bad word in almost 50,000 not bad words is what I estimate. Still not an excuse, just trying to clarify what my previous comment said.
Wado
2:00 am | September 4, 2002
Ha, Knightmare lurking in the shadows... lol. Good to hear from you.

I don't need to use explicit profanity. I actually prefer not to, I just used it as shock factor. It doesn't seem so strange when every other word is profane, but I used one really bad word in more than 20 story posts. Makes it stand out a little. Besides I have 400 years to work with to come up with new profanities that we don't have today to insert here and there without really offending any one. "Bazasip!" for example.

As for the rest, what are we basing things on, probably that younger readers have access to the site. Some stories you know right away that young ones should avoid because they are full of bad words. Mine are a bit different, in a sense mine are more dangerous for young folk to read. I put in somewhat accurate depictions of the affects of wounds and people dying. Some of the bad guys are honorable and brave but without compassion. I have serial killers, psychopaths, etc. I don't condone any of it. I should put a disclaimer not to try to do this at home...lol.

I also play a lot on cultural differences a lot. Alien cultures do things differently. This may be confusing to younger readers. I don't know much about what to do about that. One step at a time, I'm sort of in a grove writing right now so I won't make any big changes right now.
Knightmare
1:55 am | September 4, 2002
wado I say HELL no. I'd rather write stories! Its my uh... 'gift' i guess ;-)
Wado
1:51 am | September 4, 2002
Thanks MasterChief21. Val gets some clothes next chapter... lol. What can I say, the planet is like a constant 90+ degrees F and 98% humidity.

Sorry for the obscenities, I'll keep it down.
MasterChief21
1:42 am | September 4, 2002
Well, i thought that this chapter was pretty good, but i do have a complaint. Is it really nessesary for Val to run around in her nicks-and-skimpys and use extreme obscenities? Other than that, its awesome.
Wado
10:15 pm | September 3, 2002
Say, did anyone think that Imperius was evil, like really evil?
Wado
9:23 pm | September 3, 2002
Oh, and the folks that took the ark to escape the flood were Covenant. There you go "Ark of the Covenant". But that's old story stuff.

I get a kick of how you predict what will come next in the story. You should write some of your own stories and post them, you have some ideas. But of course don't spend too much time on stories when you should be studying; school will pay off much more than a few stories down the road. Now back to your predictions, you are partly correct, but that's all I can say.

Try to add a little explanation with the predictions. I could predict that some character will die in the next story, but what good is that without a reason (it's like saying the sun will rise tomorrow). Try to predict why the group will let the infected flood guys go with them and why will the flood turn on them.

I'll give you a bit of a hint, these flood will not turn on the group. They have been down in the tunnels for thousands of years. If you discovered something of great value a thousand years ago and were still around today to finally have a chance to get it, would you be so quick to dispose of the people that helped you acquire this great thing of value? First you need to know what the flood is after before knowing what their motivations are. Are they after a superweapon, well then maybe they are really evil and will turn on the party. Are they after a shielding device that will protect them from their creators, well then they might just be good guys and reward the party greatly. Just some parting thoughts.
Wado
9:03 pm | September 3, 2002
Hello Nike, use html tags to format your comments. The <br> for a line feed or the <p> for a paragraph. I like just using two <br> at the end of a comment paragraph. If you use the <p> you need to put it at the beginning of the paragraph.

As for the Ark of the Covenant, I try never to explain anything in my stories that have PH-D's of religion researching. There's no way I'm going to come up with theories that would be more than rampant speculation in their eyes. What I do is the old bait and switch. Readers believe one thing (their own conceptions of reality) and then I spring something else on them that in the end I hope they will say, "boy I didn't see that coming, but now that it did, wow it makes a lot of sense." The Ark of the Covenant in ROTA was a giant ship that legends said would be used to escape the flood. Well it was a giant ship (Ark) and it was used to escape the flood (The flood as in the bad guy floodies).
Nike
8:56 pm | September 3, 2002
P.S. When you space your comment out, how do you do it, Wado? I keep spacing but I get what you see.
Nike
8:47 pm | September 3, 2002
Very nice. A couple of mistakes I have to admit.It was the same word but you put a 's' or forgot to add a another 'o'. The was 'shoot' or 'shot'. Good story, nonetheless.The decision the group will make is, yes, they will let the demon and the infected Elite, grunt, human, jackal, Jukan, and the winged creature come with them. But later on the demon and flood-thingies turn on them?Also in "Return of the Archons" you mentioned the Ark of the Covenant a couple times [I think]. Well today in Religon class [I go to a private school; don't laugh, I have to] my teacher, Mr. Wentz, gave my glass a paper to do for homework about King David.Ark of the Covenant was mentioned on the paper. Clearly, on the paper, it says the Ark of the Covenant was a chest that held the Ten Commandments and something else.Did you use that reference for your story or are the Ten Commandments for the Covenant different then ours and THAT was what you meant?Keep it up!


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