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Comments for 'Shadows of Archon (part 5) - Forgotten Realms'



zeak
11:13 am | October 12, 2003
and then the giant sea monser broke free
Nike
1:37 am | August 18, 2002
Yep, did not make sense with the title but still good.
Spartan415
2:06 am | August 17, 2002
you got that right knight. And i eould've used it on Arch but eating him seemed funner at the time.
Knightmare
6:23 am | August 16, 2002
hey the imaginary painball fight was fun, I i'd a'had that leg you ripped off..... Damn I should used mike hard @$$ head like spar did... 'least I think it was spar...
Wado
3:50 am | August 16, 2002
Don't worry MasterChief21 I'm not ditching the story, I'm just trying to get to the parts that I think will be really good. The story has a few problems right now. Give me a chance, I have some ideas on what to do. I know I can't please everyone but I know I can do better. Just wait until my next story post.
MasterChief21
3:21 am | August 16, 2002
Dont do that please! Your story is already awesome. Like i said about your last series, its pretty close to being as good as PanZer's so keep it up.
Wado
9:47 pm | August 15, 2002
Sarge, I'm trying to say that I've been writing background material for the real adventure that was to start somewhere around part 11. I should have just written a foreword and then got right to the good stuff.

I'm going to start the whole thing over the "right way". I guess there really won't be a part 6 to this series, I've decided to start with "Shadows of Archon II" and I'm going to write the whole background in the first part. Part 1 will be like a foreword to the entire book. Am I making any sense?
Sarge
9:45 pm | August 15, 2002
Hehe Arch that's why I dropped out. BUt anyway Wado I don't understand what your saying.
Wado
8:24 pm | August 15, 2002
Arch you got me interested but can you give me a better clue on which image to look for?
Arch
7:48 pm | August 15, 2002
lol, most definately. it gets harder when you're trying to write a story with 2 other people, and all have different ideas, you often get sidetracked with odd conversations, like a war started by an imaginary paintball.... it can get worse, Wado. check out that image in the Misc. Art section, it'll give you an idea.
Wado
7:19 pm | August 15, 2002
Well, Sarge and Arch. I'm been thinking I'm wasting your time. I'm going to try to rewrite the next part and call it "The Lady and Notes". It won't be a story at all but will summarize what I had planned for the next several parts. It will be that foreword I should have written and left it at that. The part after that will start with part 11 and will be what I should have started with. This writing a book stuff is harder than I thought.
Wado
5:42 pm | August 15, 2002
There's a few things I noticed. One is that I'm using existing characters like John and Cortana which is always risky because I could stomp on someone elses preconception of the characters. Instant bad review if the characters seem odd.

But the other part is that everyone gets along really well and don't seem to ever really be a risk of failing at anything. The reader never really feels the characters are in danger. It's sort of like a campy B movie or something. Well this is what I intended, for it to be kind of cheesy (campy) at the start. I'm still building my hero's invincible army is the only way I can describe it. Once all the characters are in place (one or two more parts) the adventure really starts.

Everything so far is really a foreward to the rest. I still have to explain some things like why John doesn't just take his modified super-Long Sword fighter and go defend Earth from the Covenant. I also still really haven't explained why all the Covenant heroes in the story are really AWAL -- they have deserted their posts on this treasure hunt. etc.

Thanks for the comments.
Sarge
5:38 pm | August 15, 2002
I don't know... I don't exactly know what to say. Your writing is great. You have great writing but there's something about the STORY i don't like. Your an absoloutely great writer but something about the story I just don't know.
Arch
3:07 pm | August 15, 2002
this had almost nothing to do with ANY forgotten realms! thankfully, you didn't involve the world of Aber-Toril lol. Anyways, nice job, Wado. *sings softly to himself* Womanly figure, we really dig her....


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