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Comments for 'The Alliance: Part two'



pooman
7:12 pm | September 5, 2003
thats good to hear
Agent Shade
2:22 am | September 4, 2003
the lip's fine thanks, healing nicely, as for the Last War, i'm having trouble making up ideas for the next few chapters, so i'm going to postpone the story for now...look for "Survival"
pooman
8:33 pm | September 3, 2003
any more comments?
pooman
7:48 pm | September 3, 2003
wen are you gunna write your 5th chapter of your story shade? p.s hows ur lip?
pooman
7:35 pm | September 3, 2003
ya i dont hav microsoft word but the next chapter will b written by my friend konor... and im srry bout the AI.. LOL.. but thanks everybody and i now have an editor konor gleeson so he will edit my storys..... once again thanks
Alpha Lance
12:16 am | September 3, 2003
That was great amigo! 9.5/10 And also look for some of my stories too. And I'll be looking for more stories from you.

Alpha Lance
Creator of Halo Trilogy
Agent Shade
10:24 pm | September 2, 2003
hi pooman

if you want my honest opinion, this still needs work. the idea is good, but spelling and grammar wise, help is needed. problems with starting a new paragraph when someone new speaks. You took the AI idea from my story lol. No worries about that. A lot of spelling mistakes: "Longsoards" And you kind of rushed the story. Explain the battle in detail. Talk about various ships exploding and cries for help over the comlink, stuff like that. your idea is good, although you spelt Forerunners wrong, unless you meant it to be Forunners. Keep at it dude, and look for more stories from me


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