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Comments for 'Halo: Hunted-Part Two' |
Overwhelmin Force
7:56 pm | December 21, 2003
Thanks for the tips guys, I'll try to implement them in my other fics. Next part will be a hell of a lot better.
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CoLd BlooDed
6:45 pm | December 21, 2003
Good for you Alpha, and if ppl give you a hard time for being harsh, you tell me and I'll stick up for ya.
Critism is for your own good, it only helps you get better. People who flame you because you tried to get them to do something better don't understand, its all about getting better.
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Alpha Lance
6:15 pm | December 21, 2003
Well, to tell you the truth, I was reading the first 5 lines and I fell asleep. Action was weak, like FOrunnER said. Play the game on Legendary and see how though them bastards are. Make the story action Legendary base with blood spewing everywhere, make more Marines die. Plus, them Gold Elites have like 10x powerful shields than the blue ones. Something like that. Also use indention. The stone cold truth is that I'm not going to read a story that is not indented. Sorry, but that's life for ya.
And yeah, I'm back. And I'm not going to be easy on everyone no more. I'm going to tell you if it suck or if it was great. I don't care if I hurt your feelings, but I'm trying to help. And yes, I'm gonna be harsh.
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FOrunnER
5:35 pm | December 21, 2003
Im sorry, I meant
[i]Cold Shoulder[/i]
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FOrunnER
5:33 pm | December 21, 2003
Pretty good story. Just a few notes: First of all you should have italicized (spelled wrong) Cold Shoulder because it was a name. You do it by doing this:
[i]Cold Shoulder[/i}
Second, the Covies seem way to easy to beat. A three round burst wouldn't take down an Elites shield, it would take a full clip, especially a Gold one. Play the game on Legendary and you'll see how tough the Covies can be.
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