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Fan Fiction

Comments for 'the jackal brothers: parts 2 and 3'

I love the Daria show!!!
12:50 am | April 9, 2004
I have not read this yet and don't know where to find it, I was just looking for names of grunts for my own story....... WHICH YOU WILL NEVER SEE!!!!! ! !!!!! !!!!!! !!!
sorry about that.
12:58 pm | March 23, 2004
William Dietz is the guy who wrote the Flood.
12:53 pm | March 23, 2004
Nice story. Maybe next time you should about grunts. You don't know what smart grunts are capable of like Yuyap. With all the books Nylund has written people have forgotten about William Dietz. Although not as great or creative as Nylund (he could use the game as a reference) he's still great. Your story about the jackals are great. I must of misunderstood the thing about the elites protecting the JAckals cause that's what I thought.
1:00 am | March 23, 2004
I too don't like stories about marines inserted behind enemy lines by a pelican. For some great non human odst stories read Iron Hand of the Prophets by MadJackal.
2:01 am | March 21, 2004
Also, who's to say that all Jackals have one syllable names anyway? Halo: The Flood only mentioned the names of (I think) three Jackals. Three is not very representative of a whole. And, I can appreciate names like Adam and Jamie because I remember once reading a fanfic a long time ago in which the Elites called each other "Bob" and things like that. Also, if an author wants to make multiple syllable Jackal names, that's his right, and nobody here knows enough about the technicalities of Halo to be one hundred percent sure that he is wrong. It's called poetic liscense and we authors can make use of it whenever we feel like it. It helps to ease up on the writer so that he does not feel hindered by technicalities and can instead concentrate on storyline, action, description, etc.

Anyway, keep up the writing and you'll get better!
4:21 pm | March 11, 2004
i have read others, but i just want mine to be something differant, its unrealistic and i kinda like it that way... besides, no one cares what their names are really, and maybe thoe one syllable names translated into human are names like adam and jamie??
CoLd BlooDed
5:17 am | March 11, 2004
Nope, but people can still write better, check out other stories by Walker, Wado, SOS.Odin, Helljumper, etc. Walker and Wado are close to writing to Nylund's skill, maybe even better in their own unique way. I just think that the names "Jamie" and "Adam" made it unrealistic. My opinion.
8:39 pm | March 10, 2004
Hey, it's a great ff! What were you fools expecting, Eric Nylund?
8:26 pm | March 10, 2004
well thanx for some of your constructive critisism, at least its better than my first one.... the elites werent protecting the jackals specifically, just combatting the flood, and told the jackals to get out of the way.... i can give them names like adam and jamie, cos its my fan fic and its not really part of the halo story, jsut a figment of MY imagination, as for elites defending against the flood an dying too easily, your probrably right, i will keep in mind that elites are actually better than jacakls at fighting... i dont want my fan fic to be the smae as everyone elses, basically about marines and loads of confusing military calendar stuff and the like, anyway, vast improvement on my first ones comments.... thanx
12:31 pm | March 10, 2004
Well don't Elites usually send in the Grunts and Jackals even if the situation is suicide. THey don't protect them. Oh well, nice story, I never knew the COvenant pitied humans.
1:07 am | March 10, 2004
3:17 pm | March 9, 2004
Sorry but jackals have names like Jak, Yeg, Bok, and other one syllable names. Besides flood do not eat flesh, they infect, and if the one jackal was able to hold off those hords of infection forms then three elites could easily as well. Try not to take this offensively, I just wanted to point out some minor errors. Your story still has a lot of potential.
Thomas Harper
12:33 pm | March 9, 2004
ouch....needs improvment but no hard feelings i got slammed hard by walker and then i chewed him out but then i found out that he was rite and i fixed it and now im getting SOME praise for my work.
CoLd BlooDed
11:53 pm | March 8, 2004
Sorry, but this was crap.

First, you're saying that Jackal's have names like "Adam" and "Jamie"? Second, way too many "......" and so on. Third, your grammar sucks along with the format. Fourth, I suggest you take some time to improve before writing again.
Solidus Snake
10:43 pm | March 8, 2004
Your suspose to capitalize the title... sometimes wonder...
7:03 pm | March 8, 2004
As this is he first time I have commented on anothers story I have n right to critisise

All i'll say its a weird idea but cool and eas up on this

.......... they appear in quite alot of this story

But other then that its alright