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Comments for 'Enigma: Part 2, Suspects' |
Sarge
10:10 pm | April 11, 2003
One thing though... I doubt people would have three purple hearts. I'm not saying it's impossible but it's not likely. Like for instance I just finished reading a world war 2 book. Out of all of E company only one man received three purple hearts and I think 4 had 2 purple hearts. So I doubt all these people would have four purple hearts. I think you just did that cause you didn't know any other medals heh heh. (Medal of Honor that guys famous :-))
Bronze Star Silver Star Congressional Service Cross Medal of Valor
Just to name a few...
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Dirty Commie
9:52 pm | April 11, 2003
What the...my posts got screwed up, I'll repost it.
Something that stood out to me here was the convenient, relevant details in the soldier's files.
I would have added some extra, irrelevant details, or some red herrings.
Or you could just say "the Chief read through the file, highlighting any information that caught his eye."
Stuff like this can really add to the realism of the story.
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Dirty Commie
9:47 pm | April 11, 2003
Something that stood out to me here was the convenient, relevant details in the soldier's files.
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Dirty Commie
9:47 pm | April 11, 2003
Something that stood out to me here was the convenient, relevant details in the soldier's files.
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monitor101
1:28 pm | April 11, 2003
An ok stroy with good detail!
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Traumatised Marine
8:33 am | April 11, 2003
I enjoyed reading the descroptions of the troops!
Good.
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Dispraiser
2:09 am | April 11, 2003
I speak from expiriance, failure sucks... I screwed up my latest fanfic series, Legend Hunting and put in too much dialogue. All you can do is learn from this... DO I sound too preachy or hippyish? If I do, let me piss you off...
Poorly executed... yes...
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James Kinsella
12:45 am | April 11, 2003
And the theme for the day is "calmly"
On a lighter not I kinda liked the story but it was kinda dumb too. It had a good concept, but it was poorly executed. Try again soon!
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