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Comments for 'After Halo (k) Part II' |
A critic who hates his fuckin' job and just wants to get paid
3:43 pm | October 19, 2002
It sucks...
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Kyle
8:49 pm | September 27, 2002
Gruntliller, it said fuel rod AND plasma rifles!
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gruntkiller
5:09 pm | September 27, 2002
some minor problem such as the ops grunts with plasma rifle suddenly having fuel rod rifles, other than that could be a little slower and more discriptive but its interesting.
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Wado
4:10 pm | September 27, 2002
No worries Kyle. Keep up the writing.
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Kyle
11:22 am | September 27, 2002
Ok. I'll try to get that together. SORRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Wado
8:33 pm | September 26, 2002
This story was a bit hard for me to understand. I did catch the part where Cortana is telling the marines that there were 4 hunters behind a door. That's the kind of dialog that I thought was really creative. I would start by indenting paragraphs. It will make the text easier to read. Keep writing, I see bits and pieces in your writing that are very good. The overall structure though, still needs work.
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el_halo_diablo
7:57 pm | September 26, 2002
im not following with this...
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