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Comments for 'A Young Privates Story:The Battle of Grecko Colony: Part 2'



CoLd BlooDed
7:44 pm | July 19, 2004
I understand what you mean, KilltheMonitor, and I'll judge you on your next story on how you use the code. Sound good?
Guardian
1:51 am | July 19, 2004
too short, the story line in the end started to unfold, but otherwise, wasn't so good. Also when someone gets knocked unconcious i highly doubt they have enough time to pull the trigger and allow the rifle to fire. Hey i write ok fanfics, if you have trouble writing go read mine and post any comments you wish, as long as they help...anyways, for all the effort and all and the last part i'll give you a

8/10.



Work on it next time, a lot more seriously.
KilltheMonitor
3:27 pm | July 18, 2004
i understand that all, and i also understand that some kids dont want help, but if they do like me and others i know then just help them and fanfic wont turn into a pile of shit if ya know what i mean, and yes if Main didnt post that then i would still be wonderin about the code. i wont denie that but please help kids who want it if ya can
Dave Luck
11:00 am | July 18, 2004
Okay.

Killthemonitor101, using the code on its own is not enough.

You've got to type everything properly, just like me! There have been some beautifully coded stories that don't make sense, just because their author didn't pay attention to grammar.

- Dave.
CoLd BlooDed
5:15 pm | July 17, 2004
Monitor, I'm not bitching, but I think that if Main didn't submit that story, you'd still be asking what the code was.

The REAL guidelines aren't that hard to find.
KilltheMonitor
5:56 am | July 17, 2004
hey, i read how to use the guide lines from another fanfic, so im taking a couple of weeks to make a new seriose and to try to make up for all the stupide stuff i said earlyer(sorry i acted like a n00b)please some one shoot me before i spread haha, but serousely im really sorry, alot of stess and all and i wasent thinkin right. but im gonna fix that. hope ya like my next sereouse:-)

-killthemonitor
KilltheMonitor
5:56 am | July 17, 2004
thanks for all the help guys, im going to start a new fanfic and make it better(now that i know how to use the code hehe) anyway wish me luck
Red Ghost
3:45 am | July 17, 2004
Yeah man, your story would look and feel SO much better if you used the code to its full extent. A fine presentation will bring more people into your fan fic and they will be more open to you. Instead of just saying, "Use the god- damn code you...(fill in your own curse)!" So try that in your next post. Also, being descriptive is never bad...unless your talking about...er, nevermind.
Dave Luck
9:18 pm | July 16, 2004
Dammit! Where's the

QUOTATION MARKS?

Honestly, how come nobody bothers with them?

- Dave.
Vengeance
6:50 pm | July 16, 2004
Just do what Jess said. This story has some potential, you just need to clean the story up a little bit.
Elitehunter676
6:16 pm | July 16, 2004
Oh it sucked, I couldn't stand it. Just kiding bro. But next time put more discriptive phrases in. Also add more combat, not just bang he's dead.
KilltheMonitor
3:59 pm | July 16, 2004
well jess, if u were in my shoes at my house now, then u might understand, till then try to understand. thanks
No one
3:43 pm | July 16, 2004
No comment about first after i relized how mad u were but this one wasn't bad. At the top where u say wat time and stuff u should make it bold and the quotations. Thats it besides that it was a good story. Hope to c more soon.
Jessica
12:18 pm | July 16, 2004
Um, some quotations would be nice...And, start a new paragraph everytime smoebody speaks...Indent...Hey, it's a free world, unless you live in the middle East, and i can say what i want, whenever i want...if you don't want to hear my critism, then don't pay attention to it...sheesh, how can somebody get so worked up over a few words said over the internet?!

Jess


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