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Comments for 'The Flood: Part One' |
Steele
1:34 am | March 24, 2003
What is an LC? A landing cone? I assume you met LZ (Landing Zone). Anyway You do have some originality. There was only one paragraph. Others may have only had two or three but not too many have only one. Good job!
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monitor101
5:26 am | March 23, 2003
Not the best the howl story was one big paragragh. Dude don't be so lazy. Personaly I didn't really like it.
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Dispraiser
8:05 pm | March 22, 2003
Just when I thought that HBO was actually improving this came along. Far from the worst, but far from the best... I doubt that the lack of action is at fault though it holds a tiny part. Most of it is taht you need to try formatting yoru text and writing screamed rather than AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Like most fanfics here you are too lazy or don't know about the [indent] tag, though with your amazing one paragraph (despite dialogue) you have nothing to indent. This fanfic also suffers from something called unoriginality. See if you can find another fanfic that has almost no new creatures, people or places and see if it has been done. IT HAS!!! There are probably hundreds of fanfics that are about the exact same thing that you have just began... Maybe the plot will have some interesting twist that we all don't know about though... But wait, tehre cannot be, you are not writing a fanfic, you are writing bungie's... God I love being mean.
Live by two quotes when writing fanfics.
"You've got to wat to write because no one elses has said before what you want to say..."
and,
"Write yoru own fanfic, not Bungie's"
Actually, this isn't taht bad of a comment, so don't take it as one. All I really complained on was formatting and originality, both objective things that may only be to my perspective. So, continue, see what other comments you can garnish, and stuff like that. However, when you don;t get a 9.5+/10 from the appeasing red faction over there...
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Tank
10:52 am | March 19, 2003
I've got 2 words. Unbroken Text.
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TheRedFaction
3:58 am | March 19, 2003
Hmmm...words fail me.
::Searches through dictionary looking for words that may describe the story::
TheRedFaction
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Me the Author
9:56 pm | March 18, 2003
Im am very sorry for the sheer crappiness of my first installemnt to the new UNSC War Chronicles. I promise that the second part will be extremely better and have more action... Since they're riding a Scorp...
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