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Comments for 'Sep'Reo [The Reclamation]: Chapter 1'



CoLd BlooDed
4:56 am | March 5, 2004
HBO does those things.

*shakes fist*
JJiggssaw
1:03 pm | March 2, 2004
Why the double post, HBO? How could you do that to me [sobbing]? WHY?
JJiggssaw
12:54 pm | March 2, 2004
Thnx MCC, that was really thoughtful and im taking your advice. Don't worry, I'll write some different SciFi to practice when I have the time and I'm pretty sure school is my best subject;). Im reaching the 750 word mark on my second chapter so it should be up here soon (not that it will be short or anything it will be much longer than the first). C U then!
JJiggssaw
12:54 pm | March 2, 2004
Thnx MCC, that was really thoughtful and im taking your advice. Don't worry, I'll write some different SciFi to practice when I have the time and I'm pretty sure school is my best subject;). Im reaching the 750 word mark on my second chapter so it should be up here soon (not that it will be short or anything it will be much longer than the first). C U then!
CoLd BlooDed
11:48 pm | March 1, 2004
I'm going to high school soon, and I think I chose some of the appropriate courses to get into the writing career. I also write other stories besides Halo, just other people don't get to see them because I can't send 'em in anywhere. I love writing, it's one of my favourite things to do, that's why I appreciate any comments I can get. But to finish it off JJigg, I'm waiting for your next story. :D
MC's Cousin
10:34 pm | March 1, 2004
That was excellent for an 11-year-old but you still have a ways to go. Longer would be better. More specifics in your structures would be better. Ah...you need to work on flow a little bit. Good storyline so far...makes me wonder more about the rating on Halo. Plus your sections were a little bit sketchy, too short. They went by a little to fast, and didn't get into things enough. For a first, it was fine. I just like to let people know what they need to work on to make things better. Especially as your age, you guys can use as much advice as you can. Sift through it all, use what you want, and watch the results. Writing is about that, constantly making corrections. I was a kid once, as we all were, and if I would have stated writing then...oh that would have been good. I do agree with Jon M. Write in to mags and stuff. Snd not all about Halo either. Practice with little made up SciFi bits or whatever. Anything to shape you up into a great writer to be. The ealier you start the better, but yes, right now you really need to concentrate on school more than HBO. Sure come here every now and again, but don't slack on your work or push coming here to the point of obsession. You might dislike school now, but beleive me...you will really apreciate doing your best in the future. Keep those creative juices a-flowin', and keep up the good work.

Signing Off


MCC
JJiggssaw
7:25 pm | March 1, 2004
Anyone else read this who could give me some feedback please don't keep me in the dark! Oh and don't say it was really good for an 11 year old (no offence CoLd, Jon M). Gimme the dirt.
Jon M
2:10 pm | March 1, 2004
Aw, thanks, but the only difference between you and me is experience. I am older than you, but I wasn't that good (as good as that story you wrote) when I was 18, much less 11.

Every writer experiences block. Isaac Asimov said that he used to go to the most mindless action movie he coud see and by the end he was cleared up.

I can't remember who it was sho said he used to drink a beer and take a nap, but that's RIGHT OUT for you, dude.

The best thing to do is do anything else besides think about it. Concentrate on your school work. Do your Pre-Algebra hoework, learn to play an instrument, read something in a genre you don't normally read.

BTW, Part II of Probably No Choice is out. Its nine down from the top on (the current) page one of the FanFic - or do a title search for probably no choice and you'll see both.

Man, come to think of it, I know some 11 year olds in my neighboorhood and I'm not even sure they can write in complete sentences... ;)
JJiggssaw
2:03 pm | March 1, 2004
Thank you Jon M. Yes I really am 11. I read Probably No Choice and you have more talent than me (but im learning) so any tips you could convey would be great. I'm experiencing severe writer's block at the moment with the Dr. Halsey strain of the story so it will be a little while before the sequel shows up. Can't wait for the next chapter of P.N.C!
Jon M
3:04 am | March 1, 2004
What can I say. I'm jealous? With the exception of the suggestions Cold made, that is about as good as it gets. If you really are 11, you should start looking for pre-teen magazines to publish in. Write your stuff up and send it in. If they reject you, send it somewhere else.

Keep this stuff coming.
CoLd BlooDed
11:30 pm | February 29, 2004
Yes.
JJiggssaw
8:39 pm | February 29, 2004
thnx im guessing a horizontal rule is a dash (-).
CoLd BlooDed
8:26 pm | February 29, 2004
ONLY 11? Gah!

Well, that was spectacular work for an eleven year old. :P

I also copy paste it to word, but on my second fan fiction story (my first series) I learned the code.

[indent]= Well, put this before a paragraph and it will basically...indent.

[b]...[/b]= This makes a word bold, put a word where the periods are.

[i]...[/i]= The same thing, except it italicizes it.

[hr]= This is a horizonal rule, use it if you switch characters...well, you've read my stories, so thats an example when I use the [hr].

Hope this helps, and if anything else isn't working, just ask.
JJiggssaw
12:04 pm | February 29, 2004
Hey thanks CoLd. This is my first shot at fan fic and im only 11. But thanks! Thats great! Oh and I found my copy of First Strike so next time I can put the dates in. No I don't know about code, do tell. I just wrote it on MS word and copy-paster it onto the online word processor. It seems that the minute I post this story it gets swamped and ends up on page 2. Ill write again soon
JJiggssaw
2:08 am | February 29, 2004
*pasted
CoLd BlooDed
5:03 pm | February 28, 2004
That was pretty good JJigg, but I do have some suggestions.

Firstly, find out what the code is, don't know? Then feel free to ask me or anyone else.

Secondly, make it a little bit longer, the descriptions were good, but detail of the surroundings would paint a visual image.

I don't have a thirdly, mostly because I just woke up at 9:00 AM...


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