Comments for 'Debrief [H&R 5]'
3:54 pm | September 17, 2003
Ah Wado lol!!!!!
9:12 pm | September 16, 2003
Well, another great story JB. A little mistakes like you forgot to put a period behined sertain things, like Mrs(.) and Dr(.), but again, keep up the great work JB.
7:51 pm | September 16, 2003
Hey, wasn't Earth getting nuked by the Covenant? What the heck, did that one ship exploding kill all the Covenant? Oh well, no time for an annoyance like that when true love... Oh come on, what happened to the Covenant cruisers?
As for the story and writing, again good stuff. Keep up the writing and I'll leave you with this:
Oh the sight of love, the big green machine cometh. But no it is not he, but someone else. A familiar form to Daxia. "It is I, your lover Mark Walters. I missed you so my sweet."
Daxia's knees trembled, her legs woobled. The knot grew in her throat with all the words she could possibly say, only a few could she utter.
"I am here for you my dear. Nevermind this bulge in my chest."
"Nevermind my head hangs to the side, held only by a thread."
"Nevermind my stench of rotting flesh and that I talk through this tendril protruding from my neck."
"Oh yes, that too. But don't you love me?"