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Comments for 'Life of a grunt' |
Nick Kang
11:09 am | June 18, 2004
I have.
NK
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Jetboogieman
6:09 pm | February 28, 2004
well now that ive read it through myself OK maybe it sucks a little but I wonder how many of YOU have submitted stories
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someone that you dont know
5:57 am | February 28, 2004
is it just me or is this fanfic just one big sentence?
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Mind_Affecting_Parasite
2:35 pm | February 27, 2004
Actually, I think I'D rather play through the Library with a fully loaded sniper rifle and empty pistol.
-MAP
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Nick Kang
11:10 pm | February 26, 2004
I have neve really like being mean, but that story stank like an old person. You need more punctuation and less fragment sentences.
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Mechwarrior610
1:48 am | February 26, 2004
SEE THESE: ,.;:'"!()
Their called puncuation USE EM!!!!
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Mechwarrior610
1:43 am | February 26, 2004
Hey Jenkins I might have to try your idea of the Library with no rockets and a half spent plasma pistol it might be fun as long as I have a friend play with me
P.S. this fanfic was so sucky it made me lose most of my respect for the damn game! But you have potential keep trying.
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Mechwarrior610
1:43 am | February 26, 2004
Hey Jenkins I might have to try your idea of the Library with no rockets and a half spent plasma pistol it might be fun as long as I have a friend play with me
P.S. this fanfic was so sucky it made me lose most of my respect for the damn game! But you have potential keep trying.
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Mechwarrior610
1:41 am | February 26, 2004
I like fanfictions but yours was so unbelivably bad that you may have ruined my liking for them you bad bad writer. I'm no J.R.R. Tolkein myself but still at least I can write a somewhat decent fanfic you just plain suck!
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Sage Scorpion
9:54 pm | February 25, 2004
Hhhmmm. Nice bridge. For a stick over a puddle. You know, actually, this is the kinda story where we'd all be better off to start swimming than to try to use the damn bridge.
Thank you Jetbboogieman, we are all 20 IQ points stupider because of that story. It was getting to be where I was having trouble with all my IQ points, and you just eliminated 50% of them. Thank you.
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spacemarine207
2:41 am | February 25, 2004
woh...that thing just totally...i mean i was so uninspired i can't think of anything nasty to say..i mean bleghh!
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Sentinel
11:42 pm | February 24, 2004
............Tell me, what is this?
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Jetboogieman
8:35 pm | February 24, 2004
Well im sorry it was my second time of attempting this but im improving
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Bryan D. (A.K.A B-Man)
4:07 pm | February 24, 2004
Wow, I thought you guys were just being nice about my story, turns out it, I gues you were serious.
I read the first paragraph of this story, and it didn't feel compelled to finish it.
When you write, you always want to keep the reader hooked, until they get to the end.(Just a tip)
It has potential, but it collapses when it comes to the plot...sorry
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Deus Ex Machina
3:54 pm | February 24, 2004
Jesus, What the hell were you thinking? I don't ever read fan fictions, but after reading what some of the other readers had to say, I forced myself to check it out. Holy Hell! Have you even played Halo? Ever heard of punctuation? Go to school, man!
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me
12:56 pm | February 24, 2004
nice try. it was a good attempt, but it just didn't hold. u need more detail, more of a plot line, and sum more characters possibly. u have potential man, keep trying. but next time, test it out on ur friends b4 posting.
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yeah
12:54 pm | February 24, 2004
that stunk.
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Halo_2204
11:39 pm | February 23, 2004
Im sorry, but I have to be mean. That was absolutely ghastly. I think you need to get hooked on phonics or something. I couldn't even finish. My best advice is for you to actually read what you write before destroying innocent eyes with it. Nice effort though!
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Hawk7886
6:38 pm | February 23, 2004
Big bridge; huge explosion. . .
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Helljumper
5:05 pm | February 23, 2004
Boo
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CommanderElite
4:29 pm | February 23, 2004
phew...and you thought mine was off...at least i can use commas, but like they said it was a good concept. Except for the Halo survivors.
CM over and out
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CoLd BlooDed
3:44 pm | February 23, 2004
The bridge collapsed on 9 readers...
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MC's Cousin
2:03 pm | February 23, 2004
Yes, I would say that the bridge has collapsed, MAJORLY. You buildt it way too weak to have people actually walk on, that was defenitely a big fat miss.
Signing Off
MCC
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Jenkins
1:57 pm | February 23, 2004
I would rather go through the "Library" on legendary with an empty rocket launcher and a half spent plasma pistol than try to read this story again.
-Dammit Jenkins fire your weapon!!
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Harsh Truth
12:45 pm | February 23, 2004
Mmmm, smells distinctly like sh*t!
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JJiggssaw
12:38 pm | February 23, 2004
Good point CoLd BlooDed. It had so much potential though, mostly for a humourous series. I say keep practising because you seem to have some cool concepts.
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el_halo_diablo
3:33 am | February 23, 2004
careers*
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el_halo_diablo
3:31 am | February 23, 2004
There are hits and misses in everyones writing "carrers" and im sorry to say this one was a miss.
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ONI_operative_343
2:30 am | February 23, 2004
ummm...
me no like.
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Mastergrunt
1:23 am | February 23, 2004
Not very well done. Was extremely choppy and difficult to understand.
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blind_snowman
10:56 pm | February 22, 2004
I thin we all agree that was absolutly... *Oh no that would be mean.*
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blind_snowman
10:56 pm | February 22, 2004
I think we all agree that was absolutley... *Oh no that would be mean.*
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blind_snowman
10:56 pm | February 22, 2004
Spellings! ;)
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CoLd BlooDed
10:34 pm | February 22, 2004
I doubt there were any Covenant survivors on Halo. This story went by too fast, not a good plot (kinda pointless, actually) and poorly written. The "bridge" collapsed, as MCC would say. :P
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