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Comments for 'Short Story (Part 5)'



el_halo_diablo
2:20 am | August 20, 2002
ok i finally read it. It was good, but really, do you have to make them so short?
el_halo_diablo
8:36 pm | August 19, 2002
hey why dont you make it "very very long story" cause that will make up for 5 "short stories"
Knightmare
6:48 pm | August 19, 2002
hmm, makes sense.
Wado
5:49 pm | August 19, 2002
No I meant another alien race with vastly superior technology meets up with humans and kicks our rears. No try about it, they succeed. Earth has no defense against the aliens except to undermind their power through the use of sabotage, suicide attacks, hit and run tactics. Earth survives because we gain the sympathic ear of some of the aliens and they give us mega-technology to combat the bad aliens. But I will read this plot over and over again in different stories and enjoy it every time if it is done nicely -- what things go beyond the standard plots to make a story unique and special? That's what I'm interested in.
Knightmare
5:31 pm | August 19, 2002
Hey wado what do you mean just another alien race trying to kick humanity's rear? You mean like.. sensless stories with good v evil for no reason? lol, if not then I'm lost because there almost always is "just another alien race trying to kick humanities rear"
Wado
6:34 am | August 19, 2002
This story has some good potential. At first it looked just like another story about an alien race that kicks humanity's rear, but it's starting to get more into the politics of what is going on behind all the killing. So I hear that you are looking for title suggestions, taking the political side of things, how about something like "The Enemy of thy Enemy"? Don't know enough about the story to come up with much else.

Oh, as for the story, I am a little unclear about who is the leader of the group of marines. Not that there needs to be a leader, I mean when you have 15 humans to 4 Andensum, it makes sense to fire at the 4 bad guys, but what happens when there are 15 Andensum and only 4 humans? The humans really will need leadership and unity to get out of that one (and a lot of luck). Then again, that's just my opinion. Good work. Cheers.
Knightmare
6:30 am | August 19, 2002
Though I could babble on about my usual complaints, I now know I only have one major compalint, it reads as follows:

"Why in the heck is your story called SHORT story when its FIVE PARTS LONG!?"

Laterz! Hehehehehe....



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