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Comments for 'Chapter Four - Prelude to Paradise'



Gordi
3:53 am | January 11, 2002
Thanks, heh. I've never really mastered the mechanics of writing, I always told myself that it was better just to WRITE and polish it up later (if at all =p ) haha.
vector40
1:25 am | January 11, 2002
My goodness.

Well, I'm impressed. You continue to dazzle me with increasing levels of writing prowess. Very well done :)

Just one nitpick, not because I really care but for the future - "its" (possesive for of it) has no apostrophe. If it's a contraction, it does, but "The building exploded. Its cheese floated in the wind" shouldn't have one.

My, my... this Milton quote is getting rampant. This must be the... er, fourth story with that? I think you're the only one who's gotten it correct, though - I may have started an inaccurate precedent ::cringes::

Again, nice work.


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