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Comments for 'Apollo - Chapter 2'

2:50 am | February 13, 2002

j00 movin' in on me game, matey?

:) Very good, very good, very good, indeed.

Few points.

Proofreading would be great. I know it's a tempting to just send them off once their finished, but it can double a story's readibility to wait a day, look over it, and seriously edit it... if not more.

I think it would be cool if, when the Spartans are "capping", you wrote their conversation in some different sort of format... you know? Just something to show that it's a special conversation. Even something inane like bold would be fine.

Rendezvous is not a compound word :)

They're not actually called Bobs. They're Marines. We just call them Bobs sometimes because we're lazy.

Anyway, like I said, great job :) Definitely keep it up, I want to hear more.

-lord Vexalot