They're Random, Baby!

Fan Fiction

Comments for 'Unstable Territory: Prolouge'

4:26 am | April 27, 2004
Nice story. Very creative with your own ideas. I give it a 11/10. If you want you can read my new stories, Prophet of Love Parts I&II, if you like. Great Story by the way.
2:51 pm | April 25, 2004
Any other Ghost he can find. Let me try to explain, his personal vehicle is the vechicle that nobody else can use but him, it has its own custom modifications surpervised by him, kind of like if you suped-up a Mustang. If he wanted to use a regular frontline vehicle, he would have to go to the basses main vehicle bay and get one.
Nick Kang
10:19 am | April 24, 2004
Well, I get that part...but does he use a different Ghost for battle against the Humans?

12:25 am | April 24, 2004
To Nick Kang: There are two plasma swords that come out to the sides that are used in competitive jousting matches between officers, not front line battle. As in the try to gut each others Ghost with the plasma swords, in jousting matches your not suppose to hit them from far away, the point is to get in close withought getting burned.
The Silver Spartan
9:32 pm | April 23, 2004
FOrunnER and Mainevent, I have four chapters out, plus the Prolouge, but I screwed up the naming of Ch. 4 so if you search for Scope you will only get the first three chapters and Prolauge. Also, Ch. 5 is going to be submitted mon/tues, and not supprizingly it has 'hell' in the title (If you cought the trend in the names for my titles this will make sence...)

PS: I am running out of titles with 'hell' in them!

PPS: If none of the 'hell' stuff made sence just ignore it, it will be cleared up in the Authors Note of Chapter 5.
Nick Kang
9:09 pm | April 23, 2004
I think 'The Iron Hands of the Prophets' already covered that entire civil war thing.

Anyway, great startoff for a series. Nice details, although I can spot a few spelling errors here and there, but no big ones. But how would the Elite fight on his Ghost? If there are no plasma cannons he wouldn't be able to hit people that are far away. Anayway, keep up the good work. Can't wait for Ch. 1.


Steve Ollett
5:40 pm | April 23, 2004
I said I would read you story, and I did.

I liked the stuff from the Covenant point of view, and the rivalry between the Brutes and Elites.

What with all the tension already between the other Covenant races I don't think it would take much for certain races to take sides and that could develop nicely into a sort of civil war perhaps (not to put ideas in anyone's head though) but good stuff!
11:56 am | April 23, 2004
Yea, Homeworlds was my first series. No one read the beginning. Most came in at the middle, and were like WTF is goin on. So now I have a few loyal followers, and others who read a chapter and really wish they'd read the beginning.

I'll read yours when the next batch comes out. Promise.
The Silver Spartan
11:36 am | April 23, 2004
Lol, Mainevent I know, I know, but I am getting vey frustrated about the lack of comments! 'Course I shouldn't be complaining, your Homeworlds story was pretty much the same way at the start (if I remember correctly), btw Homeworlds on my "Can't wait 'till the next chapter comes out list" to.

The Silver Spartan
11:33 am | April 23, 2004
Interesting start to the series you have going. A few grammar errors here and there and a lack in human name originallity, but those can be forgiven easilly. I give this and 8.5/10. Very nice.
5:11 am | April 23, 2004
I was only jokin Main, I wouldn't want you to rush
1:03 am | April 23, 2004
I didn't expect this batch to come so quickly. It was only a day after the last.
12:09 am | April 23, 2004
To Silver Spartan: Well since you commented on my story I'll return the favor and read yours.

To Mainevent: thanks for the compliment, coming from you that means alot to me. I have to add, I was dissapointed that I didn't see another Homeworlds update in this batch. Dont start slackin' now boy!!

To Hikaru: Thanks for the rating and there is a reasoning behind the name.

Chapter 1 will explain alot about where they are and why its 'Unstable Territory'. Thanx alot guys.
9:43 pm | April 22, 2004
I liked it Forerunner. I write most of my stories with at least one alien P.O.V. I use a lot of P.O.V.s in my stories actually.

Don't feel that a different P.O.V. means you have to keep that character alive, or even talk about it more than once.

Good story. You're improving.

And Silver, I don't see an update to your story in this batch..
The Silver Spartan
9:00 pm | April 22, 2004
Hey, about the Elite's P.O.V. type thing, would you please check out my story I have a part from Elite P.O.V. in Chapter 3. By the way my series is called Scope. :)

PS: I usually don't ask people to read my storys either but I feel like NO ONE reads them, *sob *sob, so it would be much appreciated.

The Silver Spartan
The Silver Spartan
9:00 pm | April 22, 2004
Sry about that!

*I liked the Covenant part best,
The Silver Spartan
8:54 pm | April 22, 2004
Wow! Great first story of the series! I especially liked the part about the superiority struggle between the Elites and the Brutes! I will add this to my "Can't wait 'till the next chapter comes out list"! I like how you the Covenant part best, and the part about Mendoza, well I can tell where this is going... Great job I will look forward to Chapter 1!

The Silver Spartan