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Comments for 'Halo 2: The Forgotten-Part One' |
draGUN_03
12:18 pm | December 3, 2003
well im about 3pgs into Part 2 and taking all of the writing advice u gys have given me (indenting, and making gorier scenes :P) thnx!! it will hopefully be better than part 1, and u actually get to read a little bit about their HQ, i will also put down a note at the bottom of the Part telling whats knew...it should be done on December 13 at the latest, hope u will like it :D
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draGUN_03
2:19 am | November 29, 2003
lol...well as i said this is my first, and as THEY say(not quit sure who though, the comstomer is always right, so ill work a little try to get more indepth to it, but as i said, time will be scarce because of school (AKA homework) and my new game, Need 4 Speed: Underground :D.
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Ajax
8:39 pm | November 28, 2003
To get it so the paragraphs are indented when they show up in HBO, you have to put [indent] tags before the beginning of the paragraphs in the body section of the submission form.
Other than that, its cool so far, but you should try to mix action in along with your descriptions of the weapons. And when your snipers kill someone, we want to read gory deaths. Instead of "the elite fell out of the window" put "the elite howled as the bullet ripped through its chest" or something like that. Its got potential, keep it up.
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draGUN_03
7:11 am | November 28, 2003
and how it correspondes to halo 2, well, its basically classified missions of the sopposedly "dessalved" Delta Force(the armies most elite fighting force of today), anywho since the MC cant be everywhere at once, these badass's go everywhere he isnt, and things like the current mission where they need 2 save the President, ONI (if u gys know what ONI is)erases all data of the incident, even the whole thing of the president being held hastoge, not even MC will know...the only way 2 get the info is 2 hack into the MINDS of the gys who know about it...(sry cortana, no info 4 u!!)so yeah, o and ill try 2 come out with part 2 ASAP, but because of school and stuff, yeah. P.S: does any1 know if there is a word LIMIT or just the 750 word minimum?
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draGUN_03
7:07 am | November 28, 2003
sry about the indent thing, um, i had it indented in Microsoft Word, but i guess it didnt transfer over perfectly, -.-, sry...and about the barrel thing, the snipers actually have about the same length barrels as the non-modded rifles because of the silencer :D, i just thought that the barrels would be too long if it was same length plus silencer, not 2 mention, how the heck would u get a silencer on it with that thing on the end of the stock barrel!?!?!(read next comment)...
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tapion63
4:54 am | November 28, 2003
dude this is tight hurry up n make part2
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Hawk7886
3:56 am | November 28, 2003
How is this corresponding to Halo 2?
Why would you shorten your barrel?
I have a request:
If you don't want to indent your paragraphs, could you please space them out?
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