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Comments for 'Red Fraction - A Halo Comedy'

2:14 am | November 4, 2003
Amy was spawned as a result of a fat chick who had asked me out in seventh grade, and who I turned down what must have been at least two dozen times. It becomes obvious later that I embody the Captain, granted that you know me. That is probably why I continue to use this scenario...
7:05 am | November 3, 2003
Very funny, excellent job Dispraiser. A 400 pound ship's AI, gee that brings back memories. Oh god, make them go away.....zap..... that's better.

Keep up the great work.
9:02 pm | November 2, 2003
And about the fighter pilot thing, to quote Jake Grafton:

"Fighter jocks make movies. Bomber pilots make history."

Semper Fi


PS: Never saw much fun in fighter piloting myself... I'd probably like to be some kind of attack pilot like in an A-10 or an A-1, but I don't think they've used those since Vietnam. The A-1s I mean.
8:15 pm | November 2, 2003
NASA is in charge of Space Ops, and they usually take USAF pilots but any branch of the service can loan their fliers to the space program. There have been Marine and Navy austronauts as well. Plus, this isn't the age of countries anymore, this is the age of a UN-controlled world and a UNSC-controlled military ('cept for Earth's water Naval forces, I'd think) but they could be on loan to the UNSC, too from the UN.
4:47 pm | November 2, 2003
The navy in halo could be considered air force, if you think about it in the right light.
4:45 pm | November 2, 2003
Techinically the Air Force should be in charge of Space Operations, as that is legally their jurisdiction, not the Navy's.

And I would love to be a fighter pilot, but alas, there is not as much skill in it as there used to be. LOCK, PULL, LAUGH. Granted, there's still plenty of skill involved, but these days it's not how good on the stick you are. They get faster and easier to handle, and it really takes the awe that used to be there away.


Well, there's always the Warthogs....I'd love to fly one of those.
4:07 pm | November 2, 2003
Exactly my point, but, seeing as to that in Halo the Navy has the most important role, thinkt hey're reputation would change some.
12:58 pm | November 2, 2003
Chances are the captain would never fight, so it makes sense. The real captain, taht is. If the ship were to be invaded and the Covenant to advance as far as the bridge he would press the big red button. I mean, he's not going ot risk dying as the last line of defense ersus take the surefire way to defend the AI.
12:36 pm | November 2, 2003
Oooh, oooh, name one of them George Michaels Roberto Sanchez Peters Maguillicutty Johnson IVth.
Alpha Lance
5:35 am | November 2, 2003
True, but there isn't much sea battles anymore. Most of it takes place in the air or ground. Although, if we by some chance go to war with Russia, then there would be sea battles, I quest. 'Cause Russia gots subs and crap.
3:29 am | November 2, 2003
Heh heh... if a Navy pilot lands on the wrong ship, the write "Must be Air Force" on his plane and send him back out. Just an example of the way the rest of the military feels about the guys who sit in offices all day or fly around while they're on the ground or water getting their guts blown out, while the other guys get the best everything. Zoomies. Pssh.

Semper Fi

Alpha Lance
2:37 am | November 2, 2003
Mainevent gouts a good point. O well.
Alpha Lance
2:35 am | November 2, 2003
Navy rules. My dad was in the Navy, he was in a sub as a torpido man in the Cold War. I would to be in the Airforce.
2:33 am | November 2, 2003
Besides, a weapon discharging in the perhaps one room with the largest amount of vital monitors and decompressive glass is not a good thing.
1:34 am | November 2, 2003
The best jobs in the Navy, no specific order:

A) Anything on a sub
C) Pilot
E) Seabee
F) Anything on a gunboat
G) Anything on any other small ship, like a frigate
H) The guy who's in charge of the officer's ceremonial swords, weapons for the enlisted men in case of boarding, and ammo

I love the Navy. I'm a good sailor; my first time I saved our boat from capsizing as the man at the tiller about three times and rigged the rope on the sail so I could drag my fellow sailor behind the boat through the water. Navy. The best branch of the service.

You know one of the most beautiful scenes from any movie? When, in the movie based on the book my the same title, "Flight of the Intruder", after conducting an illegal bombing raid on "SAM City" in downtown Hanoi, Jake "Cool Hand" Grafton and Virgil "Tiger" Cole sing "Downtown" by Petula Clark as the city just about explodes behind their plane. Gosh I love that movie. The ending was better than the one in the book, too.

Well, that was pointless. Thanks for reading.

Semper Fi

11:55 pm | November 1, 2003
I'm glad someone finally pointed out that the captain kept an UNLOADED weapon, even though they were being invaded. Wish you would have taken that one step further, to include how ridiculous it is that you just magically get ammo as you walk out of the bridge. O.K, I was ranting, I'll stop. Great comedy.
9:04 pm | November 1, 2003
Let me guess, next the captain becomes a gladiator.
7:41 pm | November 1, 2003
lol that was funny
6:56 pm | November 1, 2003
Glad to see people liked this one. My comedyfics, bar one unsuccessful one, have worked off the same formula. Every one begins with the Captain, Radio Operator and "I've been thinking recently". Some may have noticed this... But I'm going to start adding regulars to the series. Petty Officer Jon 116 will probably be one, as well as some Born on Board orphans, Amy, and others as their roles appear.
4:32 pm | November 1, 2003
I wouldn't really say he's the 'king' of comedy, but Dispraiser just writes well, this happens to be a comedy.
4:32 pm | November 1, 2003
OMG!!! That was funny as hell.
"Release the Lions!"
(Its easy to fall out of a crappy chair.)
4:09 pm | November 1, 2003
The graces saw fit to post mine before yours, AKA: I pushed the button faster!!!!! :)

I keep hearing the Covenant transmitter box sound on Grim and Evil...weird....
3:56 pm | November 1, 2003
All Your Base Are Belong To Us


Yeah...anyway, not bad comedy, course i never really fall off my chair laughing when i see or read something funny. however, you still got a few chuckles out of me, good job.
3:51 pm | November 1, 2003
As a real lover of comedy, I could not resist this one, mostly because Dispraiser is practically the new master of HBO comedy. Also, el_halo_diablo wrote some hilarious comedy series; check them out some time. (The Mis-Adventures of Master Chief).

I loved this comedy, as do I all of your stories. Beware of Amy; the last remaining artificial FAT thing...
Sergeant B
3:13 pm | November 1, 2003
How did you get in front of me Mainevent!!
3:11 pm | November 1, 2003
Lions, I like lions, lions are pretty.
Sergeant B
3:11 pm | November 1, 2003
Awesome dude. You're the best comedy writer. It's so funny! I like how you did the story from the Pillar of Autumn level with some comedy but still the same. 10/10
3:04 pm | November 1, 2003
Cortana FAT? Gosh, I'm glad I never saw that. That's scary. The Chief should be grateful she was willing to go on a diet. Anyway, funny, I want to see the Captain be voted off the "island" and the Navigator made captain. That would make the ship happy until the captain comes back, threatening to release Amy on board ship. Heh heh.

Semper Fi