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Comments for 'My poem before I die' |
JJiggssaw
12:16 am | March 29, 2004
Don't cry, just eat your peeled turnips. Now.
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Hunter_Killer
3:56 pm | February 14, 2004
PS. Have a nice day
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Hunter_Killer
3:49 pm | February 14, 2004
Holy Hot Damnit, I never cuss! If I do, than i shouldn't because i'm 5 foot tall, 11 years old and in the 6th Grade in Intermediate Shcool!
So SaGe, shut the fuck up you piece of shit. I hate it; THIS MUCH when people flame JUST TO FLAME!!!! you son of a bitch!
And annoymous, you are just as bad(both of you, dickwads!), no WORSE than this... Duh... I ran outa words. Ah, screw it! Screw you annoymous, you don't have the COURAGE to climb out of yo fucking rock and reveal a name to everyone.
CoLd, Hawk, you guys are right.
LOOK AT ME! I"M SAYING THESE TWO ARE RIGHT! I CAN"T BELIVE IT DAMNIT! jk, yo =)
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CoLd BlooDed
4:34 am | February 12, 2004
I have something else to add. These poems aren't necessarily based entirely on a video game, they are about war, if you take out the words that contain "plasma" or "Covenant" then what do you have? A normal war poem. But I have to agree, this poem was less than satisfactory, much less. But don't tell me that some poets would be spinning around in their graves because people call this a poem, thats pretty damned retarded. So like Hawk said, pull your head out of your ass and say something constructive.
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Awacar
5:15 pm | February 10, 2004
Hey, ppl, what is so [b]horrible[/b] with this poem? It at least seemed as if the author tried, which cannot be said on some stories. I think that poems are difficult, both to write and to critizise, and constructive advises are hard to give. I agree with Hawk
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Anonymous
9:49 pm | February 9, 2004
no.. sage scorpion is completely right. i really hope that the author (i use that term loosely) of this poem didn't really think this was a legitimate piece of writing. it's simply garbage. really, to call it poetry is an insult to human accomplishment and literature.
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CoLd BlooDed
3:54 pm | February 9, 2004
I agree with Hawk...
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Hawk7886
5:14 am | February 9, 2004
"Really people, some of you make me sick."
Good. Go over there and be sick by yourself. It's attitudes like this that make the Fan Fiction section look bad. He was trying, so pull your head out of your ass and be constructive.
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SaGe ScOrPiOn
4:34 am | February 9, 2004
Yeah, it is pal. Pretty much any poetry based on a friggin' VIDEO GAME can't be taken seriously whatsoever. Go talk to Jack Frost, or Emily Dickinson, or, hell, even Carl Sandburg, then come back to me and tell me how they took it. Well, they can't possibly take it too badly, considering 2 of them are dead, but I bet that they would be spinning in their damn graves to hear someone call anything based on a video game "poetry". Really people, some of you make me sick.
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CoLd BlooDed
11:35 pm | February 8, 2004
Its not THAT hard...
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SaGe ScOrPiOn
8:42 pm | February 8, 2004
This was total shit. A huge steaming pile of Grade-A. You have set a new standard for terrible. First of all, a poem!? Who the hell do you think that you're fooling?!?! Do you know how insanely hard it is to base a poem on a video game and have it readable, credible, or to just be taken seriously? It's right up near impossible. But it's been done. And trust me, this was nowhere close. When I read this heap I remember thinking one thing about the author: "Stop it. Now." So do us all a favor, and pull your lip over your head and swallow. Or just never write a poem again.
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Alpha Lance
7:36 am | February 8, 2004
It wasn't good, and swears in poems. Hah... swear words can bring out the anger in a poem, but I mostly use them in songs, not poems.
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CoLd BlooDed
4:52 pm | February 7, 2004
I agree with you there, Rave. Swears in a poem really bring it down, avoid using them.
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]ReC[RaVeN
2:24 pm | February 7, 2004
Poems are very sacred to the human soul. When usuing the ubiqiutos "F Word" it really degrades any poem. Next time pick better words to express feelings. A great referance is a dictionary.
-Rave
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Guy in the Hole
12:49 pm | February 7, 2004
Well it looks like the vote would be for this piece of stuff to be the next filling for my matress down here.
OH NO!
Back in the hole!
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Hunter_KIller
11:44 am | February 6, 2004
Hey, off him, guys!
I actualy found this interesting, and related it to the Marines on Halo. THey knew they were all gona die. If not then the Halo 2 Marines. A Dying soldier bittered from days gone...
H_K: "Is he dead yet?" jk!!!!
- Hunter_Killer
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GLADIATRRR3000
4:25 am | February 6, 2004
try getting a few more... jesus... um... stanzas? whatever. the poem paragreaph things...
know what? lets just say 'make it longer'.
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CoLd BlooDed
11:24 pm | February 5, 2004
I know only a little about poems, but this one didn't really have a point (or at least a good one.)
Sorry, David, just didn't like this one.
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JJiggssaw
11:03 pm | February 5, 2004
I prefer this to the War of the Grunts (but that doesn't mean you shouldn't continue it, it has a lot of potential) but you just need to run it by someone else before you post it. Stupid mistakes like "I saying this before I die" can easily be improved so good luck.
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Anonymous
10:36 pm | February 5, 2004
absolutely terrible.
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