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Comments for 'Earth vs Covenant part 1' |
One_Shot_One_Kill
3:29 pm | January 5, 2004
pretty much sucked. first of all why the hell do football players have shotguns, let alone rocket launchers? Im sorry but I have to give it a 1/1000
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AmokTheClown
7:47 am | December 15, 2003
Run Amok like the mad clown
better grammar in your stories
and you can claim the crown
writing is a big ass ocean
be careful or you could drown
but you got the ideas, so all you need is the motion
maybe, F7 (spellcheck) just needs to be found
don't apoligize
you did nothing wrong
critics ain't gonna sympathize
just keep on going strong
we'll be constructive and critisize
untill you hit the game-over gong...
word.... lol
5/10 keep it up
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a hillybilly
2:39 am | December 13, 2003
i say 1/10 personally
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FOrunnER
4:36 am | December 12, 2003
Okay, here's the problem:
1: What the hell are football players doing with shotguns and Rocket Launchers?
2: The football players act like they've had marine training and the Covenant seemed like push-overs
3: If the Covenant invaded the stadium, then it is very unlikely the Grunts would be sleeping.
4: Why would they invade a stadium in the first place? There are numerous other targets of oppurtunity (goverment buildings, marine bases, ect.)
5: The overall writing wasnt that great either.
6: The scentences were to choppy
Overall I think you should just start back at the drawing board. Sorry if I was harsh, but that is how I feel. 2/10
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IOTAsucks09
2:30 am | December 12, 2003
ur sentences are too choppy
u wrote:
blah blah blah. blah blah blah.
instead you should write:
blah blah blah, and blah blah blah.
this will make ur stories better when u make more
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payne
10:05 pm | December 11, 2003
whoa why would they have shotguns ina foot ball stadium?
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