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Comments for 'Halo: Liberation of Earth - Section 3'



SOS.Odin
3:13 am | February 24, 2004
i thought it was good
but everything could be better
Mind_Affecting_Parasite
9:29 pm | February 23, 2004
Well, I thought it was alright. But like a fewother people have seemingly done lately. I agree with MCC. I think that you need to add more stuff to keep people reading, I try to do that myself in my new series "The Enemy Within". Other than that I'm not sure.

-MAP
HawkEye
8:57 pm | February 23, 2004
Any ideas on how i can improve the style?

HawkEye
Helljumper
7:54 pm | February 23, 2004
Good shit
MC's Cousin
4:05 pm | February 23, 2004
Well it stays fairly good but...the way it's written I don't really want to get to the bottom of the page. Like, I know this comparison must be getting annyoing but it's effective, there isn't much at the end of the bridge that I want to get to. Nothing below it that I feel worth crossing. Hook us into the story. What I'm reading almost seems like pointless ranting, just writing with no real feeling behind it, like your doing it for the heck of it. It's not your writng that does it, you write pretty well (still need to work on flow), but it's your style. Just work on it for us.

Signing Off


MCC


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