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Comments for 'Unstable Territory: Part 1: A fierce battle'



Nick Kang
3:43 pm | April 28, 2004
I enjoyed the inventory-ish thing at the beginning, and you do need to work on the dialogue a bit, but it was worth the read.

NK
Nick Kang
9:36 pm | April 27, 2004
Have you ever seen 'Saving Private Ryan'? If you have, those big cement square building with slots in the front are bunkers.

NK
Helljumper
3:32 pm | April 27, 2004
wow mainevent, that whole comment was an oxymoron. "the whole story seems phony"

"other than that, its good"

lol

ODST
Helljumper
11:35 am | April 27, 2004
Drill Sergeants are at basic training not on combat operations. It was a good story, u need to work on the dialogue in terms of realism and try to make the combat more descriptive.

ODST
Mainevent
1:48 am | April 27, 2004
You could have a former drill sergeant on a combat operation, but not a practicing drill sergeant.

And yea, the dialogue was a wee bit phony. Work on that. Dialogue seems phony and the whole story seems phony.

Other than that, its good.


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