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Comments for 'Through The Devil's Eyes'



Dari
7:12 pm | June 26, 2004
I have no idea.
Helljumper
4:21 pm | June 25, 2004
Am I really that bad fellas?

ODST
343 Salty Beans
2:02 am | June 25, 2004
Shut up, Sean. I'd say more, but I'm tired and playing HALO.

To answer romac (though I'm not a 'regular'), I think you overreacted. No one is 'out to get you.' We just hate seeing Louis work hard to post crap stories with no point and no regard for the English language and/or HALO itself. Don't be such a whiner.

343SB
Solidus Snake
9:32 pm | June 24, 2004
Oh and: "So do you guys think I should continue the story?"

Don't ask us, its your decision. I would say, "just go with the series!"
Solidus Snake
9:14 pm | June 24, 2004
Wow, people always try to piss me off making fun of me. Don't think this is racist or anything like that, but its mostly blacks at my school running their damn mouths off. Then there are them redneck acting like dicks all the time. I hate when people make fun of other people, its abuse man, it messes with their minds. So much lack of compasion these days. Everyone so thoughless.

I could easily kick their ass. But don't want to, I don't fight, I don't fight, I don't FIGHT. Mostly because I'm afraid to get suspended and fail the nine weeks and then I'll get ground which I really hate. I care about my grades. But its hard for me, I could easily lose my cool. I got a big anger problem. All that abuse when I was a kid made a me pissed off in life. All my life I've been hating.

And Romac, calm down, your not getting any respect for spamming this place. Oh, and you DON'T get your respects you EARN. And like you said, "stop or you'll look stupid." Man you’re looking really stupid right now. And there is a difference between newb and n00b. And calling everyone assholes and saying, "fuck the regulars" isn't going to get you nowhere.

I remember when I was harsh on one guy and he didn't get all mad and he took my advice, he got my respects as a writer. He kept his cool.

Then there is someone like you. You just blew up.

And we're not all good at first, I mean my stories were shit at first. Now I've improve, you have time to improve, blah, blah, blah.

Sorry for the space.

BTW good story.
Dari
4:26 pm | June 24, 2004
So do you guys think I should continue the story? Advice is needed.
Sean
6:23 am | June 24, 2004
romac just OWN3D all the regs.
Dari
2:13 am | June 24, 2004
I am so confused by those last comments...
Dari
2:13 am | June 24, 2004
I am so confused by those last comments...
Mainevent
12:30 am | June 24, 2004
I don't get herassed at school because I'm 6'2 and can kick most people's ass.

And I write because its an intelligent medium.

But judge me, a regular, all you want.

Judging people doesn't show their true character, it shows yours.
Mister Chief 117
12:27 am | June 24, 2004
Double post...
romac1991
12:16 am | June 24, 2004
OCCASSIONALLY take flaming? What the hell are you smoking? That is all we do. If we talk about "Helljumper's ODST", without the proper "RESPECT" to them. Well I think helljumper can go "Feet First into my Ass" He is just a punk ass bitch who spazs out everytime some new writer even mentions a hint of a clue to a riddle of there being an ODST. And if its not what HE thinks an ODST should be like, then EVERYONE else agrees with him. You know when I'm angry at all the "regulars", all they do is tell me to "stop it or you'll look stupid." People like me get no respect because we haven't been here for a long time. I found that all the regulars here PROBALY started out as average kids, then started writing stories EVERY chance they get. Some people have 3 or 4 pages of fanfics people like Coldblooded(how the hell do you say that fucking name?) have, and I counted, exactly SIXTY stories. I mean JE-sus Christ! All of you "regulars" All you regulars are probal bullied in school so you flame people here, so I quit for good, never will write a story. Just to make this clear this is all because of the "regulars" like cold-whatever, helljumper(that STUPID ASS BITCH!!!!), and many others who show no respect to newbs or n00bs. Well FUCK all the regulars and

ALL HAIL THE NEWBS/n00bs!!!!


PS. You'll see no more of me forever, and for the people who ACTUALLY liked my stories, my email is romac1991@yahoo.com
Well bye everyone and fuck all the regulars.
romac1991
12:16 am | June 24, 2004
OCCASSIONALLY take flaming? What the hell are you smoking? That is all we do. If we talk about "Helljumper's ODST", without the proper "RESPECT" to them. Well I think helljumper can go "Feet First into my Ass" He is just a punk ass bitch who spazs out everytime some new writer even mentions a hint of a clue to a riddle of there being an ODST. And if its not what HE thinks an ODST should be like, then EVERYONE else agrees with him. You know when I'm angry at all the "regulars", all they do is tell me to "stop it or you'll look stupid." People like me get no respect because we haven't been here for a long time. I found that all the regulars here PROBALY started out as average kids, then started writing stories EVERY chance they get. Some people have 3 or 4 pages of fanfics people like Coldblooded(how the hell do you say that fucking name?) have, and I counted, exactly SIXTY stories. I mean JE-sus Christ! All of you "regulars" All you regulars are probal bullied in school so you flame people here, so I quit for good, never will write a story. Just to make this clear this is all because of the "regulars" like cold-whatever, helljumper(that STUPID ASS BITCH!!!!), and many others who show no respect to newbs or n00bs. Well FUCK all the regulars and

ALL HAIL THE NEWBS/n00bs!!!!


PS. You'll see no more of me forever, and for the people who ACTUALLY liked my stories, my email is romac1991@yahoo.com
Well bye everyone and fuck all the regulars.
Dave Luck
6:59 pm | June 23, 2004
Excellent, Excellent. Great. Very realistic. I can't complain!
Grunty Thirst
2:11 am | June 23, 2004
That was pretty damn good. I liked how you explained the ghost echoes and the battle hymn thingy was excellent, too. Keep working on it, i'll definetely read it.



* 9.7/10
Helljumper
2:58 pm | June 22, 2004
It was pretty good

ODST
343 Salty Beans
5:11 am | June 22, 2004
Some errors that you had that I'd like to point out (being a nitpicker :) ).

First, you start a new paragraph when a new person speaks. For instance:

"And why is that, my friend?" the other responded quickly and smoothly, "We did detect a faint ghost echoes on the sensors about two hours ago". The Ship Master was intrigued heavily by this anomaly.

Should be:

"And why is that, my friend?"
The other responded quickly and smoothly, "We did detect a faint ghost echoes on the sensors about two hours ago". The Ship Master was intrigued heavily by this anomaly.

A few spelling and grammatical mistakes. For instance, you spelled the word 'whether' as 'wither'. Also, the names of ships are italicized, not bold-printed. There were
a few run-on sentences in the first paragraph, too. Here's one that is extremely noticeable:

Two of their frigates and one of the Covenant destroyers were outnumbered by eight of the vermin's frigates and assault-destroyers, they were however repelled by the one surviving destroyer, although with heavy casualties and damage in the end of the battle.

Instead, it should be:

Two of their frigates and one of the Covenant destroyers were outnumbered by eight of the vermin's frigates and assault-destroyers. They were, however, repelled by the one surviving destroyer, although with heavy casualties and damage in the end of the battle.

Or you can replace the period I put in there with a semicolon (;).

There were a couple punctuational errors, especially in the 22nd and 23 paragraphs (if you are going to count, exclude the first Date/Time/Location paragraph).

I really enjoyed the detail, especially for the 'ghost echoes'. Great explanation. And the battle hymn at the end was superb.

343SB

PS: Don't feel picked on because I pointed out every single frigging error. I only do these long, detailed posts to the authors I think are really going somewhere. Peace Out.
Sean
5:06 pm | June 21, 2004
Wow this story makes me feel like I'm watching a cutscene from the game.


9/10


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