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Croton 3.76 – The sea may be a cruel mistress…but trees hurt more
Posted By: Trevor<twhite1721@hotmail.com>
Date: 28 September 2003, 4:32 PM


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Grater sat fiddling with what was left of his left arm. Then it suddenly hit him, like a bad case of Montezuma's revenge.
"HOLY CHRIST ON A CRACKER!!!! WE HAVE TO GO BACK!!!"
Renner looked up with a puzzled look on his face.
"What the hell are you blathering about now Grater?"
"BETTY!!! WE LEFT BETTY BEHIND!!!"
"Who the hell are you talking about?" Renner asked.
"THE NUKE...WE LEFT IT!!!" Grater responded.
A chilled silence fell over drop-ship "Spanky 123" save for the deafening roar of the engines.

Renner leaped out of his seat and ran to the cockpit of the pelican where he found the drop-ship's pilot, Vocar Felpings Emmanuel Geoffrey Wendell XIII, fast asleep at the stick. Upon seeing this Renner lessened his pace and began moving as stealthily as possible. And as gently as he possible could, Renner woke Vocar up.
"WAKE THE FUCK UP!!!!" Renner yelled at the top of lungs...which was significantly louder than the drop-ship's engines.
"WHA!!!!" was all Vocar could get out before he fell out of his chair.
"I said we have to go back. We left the nuke."
"I'm sorry sir but my orders don't say a damn thing about turning this bird around."
Upon hearing this Renner slipped into a blind rage, pulled his pistol from its holster and jammed it into the temple of the indignant pilot.
While all this was going on Grater was still whining about leaving "Betty" behind.
"I can't believe I left her behind. How could I have been so stupid?" Grater whimpered.
At this point tensions in the drop-ship had reached a record high. And wouldn't you know it Shandor decided he had had enough of Grater's whining. He got up, walked over to Grater, grabbed him by the shoulders and with all the strength he could muster which wasn't a lot, slapped Grater across the face.
"Get yourself together man!!!"
With no sign of hesitation, Grater grabbed Shandor by the neck, all the while mumbling about leaving "Betty," and quite literally threw him out the open back of the drop-ship. You could still hear Shandor yelling in protest as, with the grace of a dead carrion bird, he skipped across the pine canopy below.

He finally came to rest against the trunk of a huge tree that broke through the canopy like a monolith on the moon. Shandor had stopped, briefly. But gravity would not be denied its say. Therefore Shandor immediately fell, hitting every single branch as he plummeted toward the unforgiving ground. Fortunately for Shandor he happened to fall into the hands of a well armed Covenant patrol.

Back in the drop-ship Grater was getting the third degree from Renner and the rest of the squad.
"I can't believe you just fucking threw him out the back" Renner said.
"Well...he touched me" Grater responded, "but it was funny though."
"That's not the point" Renner said, "you just chucked him out the back."
At this point Andrea piped up.
"Do you think he survived the fall?"
"Not if we're lucky" Hillock added.

On the ground Shandor was just waking up from his unscheduled mid-flight nap.
"I hurt all over. I can't belie...uhh" he was cut short by the butt of a Covenant plasma rifle.
The Elite that had just relieved Shandor of his burdens of consciousness stood staring at the body of the human that lay on the ground before him. He then made an odd comment, which was overheard by a Grunt by the name of Belyap.
"Lucky little monkey...if anyone else had found you you'd already be dead."

In the pelican Renner was thinking about what course of action to take.
"Well that clinches it...we're going back" Renner said as he looked intently out the open hatch at the back of the drop-ship.
"WOO HOO!!! We're gonna get my nuke back. We're gonna get my nuke back!!!" Grater chanted as he jumped up and down like a small school boy.
"No...we're not. We're going back for Shandor. However if we somehow stumble across our misplaced nuke we will retrieve it...but we're not going to go looking for it.
"Hey Vo, I want you to..." Renner was cut off as the drop-ship's pilot leaped out of his seat and in a few moments was directly in Renner's face...well his chest anyway seeing as how Vocar was easily a foot and half shorter than Renner and looked remarkably like Shandor.
"MY NAME IS VOCAR FELPINGS EMMANUAL GEOFFERY WENDELL XIII!!! It's not Vo, or Felps, or Manny, or Geoff, or even Lucky."
"It's Vocar Felpings Emmanuel Geoffrey Wendell XIII and don't you forget it" he snapped.
"Alright...Lucky" Renner retorted as he raised his pistol, which he hadn't yet re-holstered, "get your ass back into that pilot's chair and find a clearing that you can set this flying tin can down in."
Renner then spun on his heals facing his company.
"We're going after our man."
This statement was met with half-assed groans of approval mixed with discontent.
"What's this...that doesn't sound like the kind of response a soldier gives" Renner said.
"YESSIR" the entire squad yelled as they snapped to attention.
"That's better, now let's go find Shandor."
"Sir, permission to speak freely" this came from Micigger, who had barely said two words since the squad was evacuated.
"Why don't we use Shandor's homing signal to find him, Sir?"
"You mean this" Grater interrupted, throwing Shandor's vest, which housed his homing device, at Mcigger.
"Well, when you put it that way" Micigger responded...slightly saddened.
"No, we're going to set this boat down and we're going to go find Shandor the old fashioned way."
"We're going to use satellites?" Hillock asked.
"No, we're going to go search for him using what God gave us."
"So...we are using satellites?"
Upon hearing this Renner walked over to Hillock and pistol whipped him.
"No, we're going to slowly walk through that pine forest looking for him."
"Oh, ok. I get it now" Hillock somehow managed to get out.
"Alright pilot, take us down" Renner yelled up to the cockpit.
"But sir, using the satellites would be a million times easier" Vocar responded.
"We can't use the satellites...because there aren't any god damned satellites" Renner said. By now it was obvious that all this talk about satellites was wearing on Renner's nerves.
Just then Andrea stepped in.
"But sir, there are satellites. I've got the uplink right here."
Renner just stood there completely silent for what seemed like a long time.
"You mean to tell me that all this time we've had access to a satellite network and nobody told me."
"I thought you knew sir."
Several grumbles that sounded remarkable similar began to rise from the rest of the squad.
"Alright then, we'll use the satellites."
"Lucky, get a fix on Shandor and get us as close as you can."
"Yes sir...oh shit."
"What's the problem" Renner asked.
"Well it seems that your man is being held in the middle of a Covenant base."
"That's impossible, the Covenant don't take prisoners."
At this point Hillock casually reminded Renner of what they've been through recently and was pistol whipped again for his troubles.
"Alright then, change in plan" Renner muttered.
"Lucky, I still want you to find us a landing spot as close as to that Covie base as you can without being seen."
"I'm going to take my squad and we're going to try and sneak into the base."
"This is where you come in"
"Where I come in sir?" Vocar asked unsure of what Renner had in store for him.
"Yes, I want you to buzz the base a few times with all the guns this thing has blazing."
Renner then turned to address his squad.
"In the confusion we're going to sneak in and, if all goes well, get Shandor and get out before anybody notices."
"Now, let's get this crate moving" Renner ordered.

The pelican began to slow down and then without any warning did a 180 degree spin in mid-air. This little maneuver threw everyone inside against the inside hull with a great deal of force. It then sped up so fast that everyone inside was forced to hang on for dear life for fear that they too might enjoy the same fate that Shandor had and be introduced first hand to the affects of gravity.

It was a short hop back to where Grater hurled Shandor out the rear of the pelican and wouldn't you know it there was a clearing nearby. Nearby being 3 clicks, but that's not important.
"Alright Lucky, set us down in that clearing."
"I'll signal you when we're in position for you to start your buzz runs" Renner yelled to Vocar over the sound of the engine.

Vocar let the pelican drop like a rock for the last 60 feet to the ground. This caused all of his passengers to go weightless for a second and then slam back into the floor as he hit the air breaks two feet above the ground. It was obvious to any mildly intelligent person that this was Vocar's revenge on Renner for calling him Lucky.

Renner's squad hopped out of the back of the drop-ship and quickly headed for the safety and cover of the tree line. Not only were they afraid of being spotted by any Covenant in the area but they were afraid that Vocar might decide to start his strafing runs a tad early...and on them instead of the Covenant. They then started making their way through the dense pine forest towards their objective completely unsure of what they may find.





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