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(I wrote this because I was tired of reading stories about the marines fighting all day long and never eating. I figured that on the battlefield there must be a source of food, why not the Covies! Yes, I am very morbid and have too much time on my hands. Tell me what you think. That means post something under the comments menu.) Cooking Covies with Neco DivadRotisserie Jackal You will need,
Step 1) Find a dead Jackal, preferably without shotgun wounds. Take your combat knife and make a vertical slice through the midsection. Gut it like you would a bird. Make sure you got the bullet or bullets out of it. Step 2) Once it is gutted, build a fire. Take 5 strong sticks and make a rotisserie. Make sure that the rotisserie will be about one foot above the fire. Take a pan or your frontal armor plate and place it over the fire but under the skewer. Use rocks for that part. Step 3) take the cleaned Jackal and tie the arms to the chest in an Egyptian mummy style. Take your spit and either tie the legs and neck to it, or jab it through the center of your Jackal. Step 4) Place the spit with the Jackal on it over the fire. Slowly rotate it until it turns a yellowish color. This means it's done. Place it in the pan or armor and use the dripping as dressing. Eat your well-earned and delicious meal. Grunt Surprise For this meal you will need
Step 1) find your grunt. It should have minimal gunshot wounds. Pass up the ones with shotgun blasts. Step 2) Take and carefully peel the survival suit. DO NOT CUT ANY WIRES! That could cause his methane tank to explode. Step 3) Build your fire. Step 4) Once you have his "armor" off, take your knife again make a horizontal cut about midway up his chest. The grunt ribs are places horizontally. Try to cut in-between them, and then gut it. Take and place the grunt on the fire. It may seem weird at first but you will see why in a moment. Watch it carefully; you should see purple lumps starting to form after a few minutes. When they get about the size of an eye, take the grunt off the fire. Open it up and you will see that the inside where you had gutted is now full of fresh smelling meat. It is safe to eat as soon as it has slightly cooled. No one knows why this happens but it is being taken advantage of by soldiers all over the field. The surprise comes when you eat it. The meat causes soldiers to be more aware of their surroundings. (I figured that incase you forgot to read the top, I'll post it here as well. I wrote this because I was tired of reading stories about the marines fighting all day long and never eating. I figured that on the battlefield there must be a source of food, why not the Covies! Yes, I am very morbid and have too much time on my hands. Tell me what you think. That means post something under the comments menu.) |
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