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The adventures of Mate-rik (part 2)
Posted By: Leadbutt<geoffbutt@yahoo.com>
Date: 10 August 2002, 4:30 am


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All of a sudden, the Mater Chief saw a bulbous form floating in space. "Shewt it!" he ordered Idiot.

"Huh?" said Idiot

"Shoot it," said Mater Chief

"OK!" said Idiot and he shot the beer can out of the Mater Chief's hand.

"Not the beer can, idiot Idiot, the ship flood outside!" said the Mater Chief.

"Duh, OK," said Idiot "Flood? Where? Who? AAAAAAHHH!" Then he shot it.

A .22 caliber bullet crawled through space due to the fact that Idiot had no .22 gun, so he threw the bullet at the flood. The bullet bounced off, but the ship exploded.

"Sure don't make 'em like they used to!" said Mate-rik

All of a sudden, 500 flood in space suits came rushing out of the ship form at the Shortsword. 446 of them completely missed the Shortsword, but the remaining 54 attacked the ship. Unfortunately for the flood, when they tried to swipe the Shortsword, the spacesuits ruptured, and the flood died.

"Oh, jolly good shot," said Idiot

"Since when have you been British?" asked Mate-rik?

"Since I drank this jolly good tea!" he replied.

"Just don't drink the stuff in the green carton," said the Mater Chief.

"You mean this stuff?" asked Idiot. "Jolly good stuff, mate!"

"Oh great. Now that he drank tea and kangaroo milk he's a British Australian!" said Mate-rik.

"The only way to get him back to normal is to give him cow milk, soda pop, then a food nipple," said the Mater Chief.

"Did someone say FOOD NIPPLE!?!?!?" asked Idiot, forgetting for the moment to be British Australian.

"As a matter of fact I did," said the Mater Chief. "But we'll have to go to Food Nipples 'R' us, then American drink central."

"OBOYOBOYOBOYOBOYOBOYOBOYOBOY!" screamed Idiot. "FOOD NIPPLE!"

"Dude, don't have a breakdown," said Whoretana.

"Hey, I thought I told you to keep out of the virtual pot!" said the Mater Chief.

"Sorry."

"Warning, I am receiving a message!" said Mate-rik. "'Warning, 3000 food nipples on collision course'!"

"FOOD NIPPLE!!!" screamed Idiot seconds before he had a minor heart attack.

"Hey, the Motiner gave us a defective grunt!" said Mate-rik.

"Maybe if we all say you-know-what, then he'll got up!" suggested the Mater Chief.

"Okay, 1, 2, 3, GET UP OR WE'RE GOING TO KILL YOU!!!" everyone screamed.

"Okay, okay, I'm up!" said Idiot. "Hey, the Australian British stuff wore off!"

"Yep, you got so freaked out that it all burned off," said the Mater Chief.

"BURNED OFF?" asked Idiot. "AAAAHHHHHHHHH! I'm being covered with flames!"

"I think that you are right in saying that we got a defective grunt," said the Mater Chief.

"Maybe if we feed him something, he will stop hallucinating," said the Mater Chief.

"Well, I am a little bit hungry," said Idiot.

"Well, here is a favorite elite snack: fried brain," said Mate-rik.

"Wh-what kind of brain?" asked Idiot. "Is it grunt?"

"Nope, it's Jackal" he replied. "Jackals always made us mad, pretending they were boss."

"Here is a favorite human food, a hamburger," said the Mater Chief

"FOOD NIPPLE!!!!!!!!!" said Idiot.

And so the mystery of what a FOOD NIPPLE was was solved.

"YUM, YUM!" said Idiot. "





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