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Fan Fiction

Posted By: Codyman<Shadowlink8890@aol.com>
Date: 4 October 2009, 1:00 pm

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       "Eat plasma death, meat bags!" cried the lowly covenant solider, as it charged forward, firing its weapon blindly. From the shelter of a near-by bush burst a man, positioning himself between the grunt and the huddle of humans the alien was charging.

       With swift movement the man drew a canister and fired its contents into the attacker's eyes. With a cry the monster fell to its knees and dropped its weapon.

       "I'm placing you under citizen's arrest," said the man as he used zip ties to handcuff the grunt to a light pole. "For illegal dis-charging of weapon, as well as possession of foreign contraband."

       "Oh Patrolman Zicattia, you're so brave," said one of rescued people.

       "Nonsense Judy, I'm just doing my duty to monitor and report all suspicious activity in the neighborhood," said Zicattia. "It's what I volunteered for."

       A golf cart sped into sight, inside sat a teenage boy wearing the same uniform as the patrolman, black shorts, a bright red polo and matching cap with the initials NWA sewn on the front, he pulled up next to the crowd and stopped.

       "Patrolman Zicattia, there's a whole gang of Covenant troops coming this way, they're attacking the whole city! I think they're trying to get to the power plant," cried the boy.

       "Well if they try to get through this neighborhood they're never gonna make it," said Zicattia. "Move over Steven, I'm driving."

       He jumped behind the wheel of the golf cart, but before he could pull off Judy stopped him.

       "Wait! Shouldn't you take the gun that alien was using?" she said.

       "I'm not licensed to carry a firearm," said the patrolman. "Besides I have my standard issue pepper spray." He took his foot off the brake and slammed the accelerator, whizzing the duo around the corner at 15 miles an hour.

       Ahead of them lay a firefight in action, a group of marines, fighting against two elites and a handful of grunts, with a scatter of bodies from both sides on the ground. Driving with one hand Zicattia pulled his megaphone to his mouth.

       "Cease all illegal activity immendialty or I will be forced to use evasive action," blared the words from the megaphone.

       "Doesn't look like they're planning on stopping boss," said Steven.

       "Then it time to show them why Pine Bush Road was voted safest neighborhood to live in, three years running." The noise had caused the aliens to turn around, so they were watching when the golf cart pulled to a stop and the two patrolmen jumped out, hefting their pepper spray like guns.

       The elite laughed at the human's lack-of armor and weapons, allowing Patrolman Steven time to fire a care-fully aimed stream of pepper spray into its eyes. Patrolman Zicattia concentrated on zip tying the grunts in their attempts to flee. The last elite crumpled as the remaining marines fired on him.

       The two marines approached Zicattia and Steven, who was still pepper spraying the elite.

       "I don't know who you are but we're sure glad to see ya," said one of the marines. "We were cut off from the rest of our squad when our troop transport-" The solider was cutoff as Steven turned his spray from the elite's eyes to the marines.

       "What do you think you're doing?" began the other trooper; before Zicattia disarmed him of his battle rifle with a self defense moved he had learned at a community college last year.

       "You're both under citizen's arrest for assault with a deadly weapon," said Zicattia, pointing the battle rifle threateningly. "Steven, zip tie them both."

       "Are you out of you mind? We have to get to the power station and warn the forces there about a planned covert attack. If that power stations fails the shields guarding the orbital-"

       "Tell it to the judge," Zicattia said, cutting off the marine with a rifle butt to the face.

       Anthony Zicattia stepped into his house and closed the door behind him. He place set his hat on its rack and walked into his living room, where his wife greeted him.

       "Oh, hello honey, how was your day," she said.

       "Eventful, would you believe there was a shooting in the neighborhood?"

       "Right here on Pine Bush Road?" Grace Zicattia ran to her husband's side. "Are you alright? What did you do?"

       "I'm fine, I called the police of course, I couldn't get an operator, but I left a message, I'm sure they've taken care of it by now."

       "Oh I hope so; I can't believe something like that would happen on Pine Bush Road."

       "Don't worry about it dear. How was your day?"

       "Fine, except," Grace frowned. "The TV hasn't been working again, I haven't the slightest idea what's happening in the real world." Just then the power went off, sending the couple, and the city, into darkness. "Darn that electric company, I wish I could do something about this," said Grace.

       "I wouldn't worry about," said Zicattia. "You gotta learn that some things are just out of your jurisdiction."