Comments for 'Halo 2: Chapter 1'
2:08 am | March 28, 2004
Good, I like it, vvveeeewwwyy innntteerrreessttiiingg. :P
2:08 am | March 28, 2004
Oh, and I'm talking about MCC's grading system.
5:57 pm | March 24, 2004
Alright, but i'll be honest with you. I didn't finish that. There were just inconsistancies that made me want to reach into the computer and correct you story, or just bash it with a studded bat.
First, unless you are purposely trying yo be unrealistic, i'll tell you what's so incredibly wrong here. Longswords don't have elevators, none, zip, zero, nada. And i'm sure the chief was not so [lazy? no not the right word] that he would look at a clock instead of:
A. Ask Cortana
B. Bring it up on his HUD
or C. Calculate the time based on the locations of the stars around him once the Longsword exited Slipspace.
Either way, I really don't think he would have looked at a clock, but maybe I'm just being silly and babbling about a non-important thing.
But don't get me wrong, little things are really important in a story. If you don't have any, you really don't have the detail level needed for a Halo based story. if you have to many...actually I need to expand.
Unless your story is just jumbled with little things, there can never be too many in my opinion. It all depends on if you "little things" are pointless, annoying, and even confusing--or if the "little things" are very relevant to your story, help put the reader "in the zone", or are just plain fun to read.
Think about all that, and now I'm going to try something new:
(for the different parts of rating, I'm using a 1-10 point scale; for the total, i'm using 1-100 scale)
Interest: lacking anyting that really made me want to read the whole thing: 5/10
Storyline: because of [above] couldn't get into it: N/A
Structure: needs work on flow, too jumpy from here-to-there: 6/10
Spelling: not bad, didn't notice any big things from section that I read: 9/10
Feel: it really didn't put me into the story, just a feeling of: barely skimming the surface: 6/10
Overall/Total: not the best but not the worst, you have work to do, but could have potential:
Now guys, tell me what you think of this method of grading.
12:18 pm | March 24, 2004
Nice story. I'd just loke to tell you that Longswords don't have those engines that lets you enter slip space but your story doesn't have to be realistic.
2:48 am | March 24, 2004
Nice title, origional.
Just Kidding, no hard feelings. Good job.