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Comments for 'Urban Warfare Ch.1: 7th Platoon' |
hunter_that_dances
1:10 am | July 1, 2004
uh..i just read frankie's update and it said that the carbone was like a battle rifle. my bad!
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hunter_that_dances
7:03 pm | June 30, 2004
uh.. i read the halo prsonlities thing, and i thought jackals would be snipers since they were [i]assasins[/i]
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Guardian
3:03 pm | June 30, 2004
7.5/10, keep working on it, the ODST you did well they sounded sorta like marines, instead of ODST. Also Jackals, regardless so far in Halo or Halo 2 or in any of the books that are out and yet to come out. ever use Carbine's, its Mostly the Elites.
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Nick Kang
12:48 pm | June 30, 2004
You should read 'Halo personalities and how to use Them' by 343 Salty Beans. It's on the second or third page, I think. It explains how to tackle characters such as ODSTs.
NK
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Helljumper
11:36 am | June 30, 2004
i did offer suggestions in my first post son
ODST
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Mainevent
3:21 am | June 30, 2004
They have First Strike at my local library.
It has an ODST in it.
But if you need to learn about ODST, then read up on Leathernecks, the ODST predecessor.
Starship Troopers even uses Leathernecks in it.
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hunter_that_dances
2:49 am | June 30, 2004
all ye people, i will do better next time, if i can get my ahnds on some Halo novesls. anyway, offer me suggestions instead of the crappy stuff called "criticism"
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hunter_that_dances
2:29 am | June 30, 2004
helljumpoer, my parents dont have any spare cash right now, so how do you expect me to read The Flood?! (they dont have it at the library, I checked, *sigh*)
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Helljumper
2:27 am | June 30, 2004
Read Halo the Flood before deciding to tackle a story about the ODST. Remember they are Special Forces light infantry unit like today's Rangers.
ODST
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hunter_that_dances
2:27 am | June 30, 2004
damn it, why the hell does my computer keep double posting?!
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hunter_that_dances
2:24 am | June 30, 2004
er...helljumper, how should i write the ODSTs, huh? Is it more swearing, or something else?
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hunter_that_dances
2:24 am | June 30, 2004
er...helljumper, how should i write the ODSTs, huh? Is it more swearing, or something else?
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hunter_that_dances
10:30 pm | June 29, 2004
and kang, thanks for pointing out my mistake on Locklear's name, :-)!
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hunter_that_dances
10:26 pm | June 29, 2004
Helljumper, u have got to be kidding me. (long whistle), man my bro is in the Marines, so i do know something about the military, and could you at least offer suggestions?
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Nick Kang
12:45 pm | June 29, 2004
Yeah, it was kinda drab.
And Lock Lear's name is Locklear.
NK
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hunter_that_dances
11:58 am | June 29, 2004
hey helljumper, i was trying to be a little humorous about the whole landing on spec ops team thing. as with the stray plasma torpedo, i forgot to mention that there was a huge fight going on in orbit, my bad. and i said it was a MODIFIED Pelican, with a huge pod instead of tiny separate ones
thanks for the comments, and ive read first strike, and am anticipating other books for Christmas(besides halo 2)
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Mister Chief 117
11:18 am | June 29, 2004
Stray plasma torpedo? That's kinda hard to believe. But I'll finish for the sake of posterity.
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Sentinel
4:21 am | June 29, 2004
And I for one, didn't like this story.
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Sentinel
4:21 am | June 29, 2004
And I for one, didn't like this story.
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Sentinel
4:17 am | June 29, 2004
No need for a fight here, Helljumper has a point.
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Bonecrusher
3:21 am | June 29, 2004
Maybe YOU should close your damn mouth Helljumper.
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Helljumper
12:59 am | June 29, 2004
I was never in the military but i did 4 years of Army JROTC in High School ending my senior year as battalion commander. I've been on military bases and i've done military exercises with real people in the US Army. Because of college (and the full paid tuition) I did not enlist like I planned. Anyway i know more bout the military than you do. Besides this is Halo, its not real I like writing these stories because it allows me to be creative and gives me something to do when i'm bored. Plus I know more about the ODST than you do because i've read all the books and i've read Starship Troopers (different from the movie) which the ODST were taken from. So don't come to this site talking shit.
ODST
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hunter_that_dances
12:27 am | June 29, 2004
pvttucker, youre a moron, ruining my punch line, lol
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Pvt. Tucker
12:09 am | June 29, 2004
I bet he does :P
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Pvt. Tucker
12:09 am | June 29, 2004
hunter_that_dances
1:03 AM | June 29, 2004
yea, and helljumper, no offense, but i doubt that even you would know what a REAL ODST would be like
__________________________________________________
I bet he does :P
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hunter_that_dances
12:03 am | June 29, 2004
yea, and helljumper, no offense, but i doubt that even you would know what a REAL ODST would be like
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hunter_that_dances
12:03 am | June 29, 2004
yea, and helljumper, no offense, but i doubt that even you would know what a REAL ODST would be like
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hunter_that_dances
12:02 am | June 29, 2004
yeah, and helljumper, i was trying to center it only on ODSTs, but you changed my mind otherwise
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Pvt. Tucker
12:02 am | June 29, 2004
The fuel rod guns have fail safes, sooo they couldn't be salvaged in the story. Ehhhh the story wasnt bad, but wasnt great either, some corny bits. 7.2/10
"So what are they talking about again?"
-Pvt. Tucker, red vs. blue
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Severian
8:09 pm | June 28, 2004
No wonder this story was kind of... stupid.
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Severian
8:09 pm | June 28, 2004
Scratch out the last part. I was being rude.
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Helljumper
8:00 pm | June 28, 2004
i don't know bout this one. You can't drop HEV's from Pelicans and then you started wtih them in orbit and then like the next sentence they landed on a Spec Ops team. I think you need to read the books again. I'm disappointed in how you did the ODST. Please read the books and seek advice before trying agian.
ODST
see i don't always have to curse
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Shifty
7:55 pm | June 28, 2004
Not too shabby... but sections of speach are in their seperate paragraphs. ie. return and indent before quotation marks.
I found it slightly confusing at parts(those breaks in stories do that to me) but otherwise work on puncuation, thats about it...
Shifty
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hunter_that_dances
7:03 pm | June 28, 2004
i am INDUSTRIAL_aVATAR
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